The Compassion Fatigue Solutions Blog

Mercis. Point Final.

Par Alexandra Fortier, MSW, RSW.

« Appel aux champions » prend une pause d’été! Voici un dernier carnet avant les vacances.

Comme il a été mentionné dans mes parutions précédentes, j’aime remarquer les bonnes et simples choses tous les jours. Je remarque celles-ci dans des situations, des moments et chez les gens. J’aime aussi amener cette habileté un peu plus loin. Lorsque quelque chose m’impressionne, lorsque je suis en admiration ou encore, lorsque j’aime ce que quelqu’un porte, je l’exprime.

J’aime offrir des compliments et de la reconnaissance sincères. Ainsi, je sens que je contribue à créer un effet domino où nous ajoutons du positivisme dans le monde.

Toutefois, ce qui est intéressant lorsque l’on offre un compliment, peu importe quel en est le sujet, est la réaction des gens. Voici quelques-unes des réactions que j’ai pu observer :

  • Le silence inconfortable, suivi du sourire forcé.
  • La justification (« J’aime ta robe », répondu par : « Elle est vraiment vieille et je l’ai acheté en solde »)
  • Le déni (« Ce n’est rien, je n’ai vraiment pas fait grand-chose »)
  • La méfiance (voix interne – « C’est quoi qu’elle veut?! »)

Mais ce que j’aime vraiment est lorsque quelqu’un prend le temps d’arrêter, d’entendre ce qu’est le compliment en question, puis l’accepte.

Malheureusement, bien que je sois bonne à remarquer les choses extraordinaires qui m’entourent, et être en mesure de le verbaliser, je suis tout à fait coupable d’être le type de personne qui a de la difficulté à accepter un compliment qui m’est offert.

Donc, délibérément, j’arrête ma voix intérieure (qui tend à faire une des réactions mentionnées ci-dessus), afin d’être en mesure d’être présente au compliment offert et de… ouf… l’accepter.

Mon défi pour vous est donc de prendre le temps pour accepter un compliment (et aussi de continuer à en offrir).

Comment faire pour accepter un compliment? Voici les étapes :

  • Soyez présent et écoutez ce que la personne est en train de prendre le temps de vous dire
  • Dites : « Merci »… puis, arrêtez… point (évitez d’ajouter quoi que ce soit… c’est beaucoup plus difficile que cela le semble).
  • Oh, n’oubliez pas de sourire dans le processus. Mais sachez, votre sourire risque d’avoir une apparence inconfortable au début, mais persévérez. Éventuellement, cela viendra naturellement.

Sur ce, j’aimerais vous remercier d’avoir lu mes blogues cette année et aussi pour tous vos commentaires (maintenant est le moment de mettre en pratique le défi proposé :-)

Passez un bel été!

 

Thank yous. Period.

by Alexandra Fortier, MSW, RSW.

“Calling all champions” is a monthly column by Alexandra Fortier, a member of our team. “Calling all Champions” is taking a break for the summer so here’s Alexandra’s last post before the holidays.

As I have highlighted in my previous posts, I like to notice the good and simple things everyday. I notice these in events, in moments and in people. I also take this skill a step further, when I like something I’m impressed with, in awe of or simply if I like what someone is wearing, I will tell that person.

I love giving sincere compliments and acknowledgments. I feel that I’m contributing to creating a ripple effect where we are spreading positivity in the world.

What’s interesting when giving a compliment – no matter the topic – is how people react. Here are a few reactions I’ve observed:

  • The awkward pause, followed by the awkward smile.
  • The explanation (“I like your dress”, answered by “This old thing? I got it on sale”)
  • The denial (“I really didn’t do all that much”)
  • The mistrust (internal voice – “What does she want?!”)

But what I really enjoy is when someone stops, listens to the compliment paid and accepts it.

Unfortunately, even though I’m good at noticing the greatness around me and verbalizing it, I’m guilty of being the type of person who has difficulty accepting a compliment when it comes my way.

I’ve been deliberately stopping my internal voice that goes to my default mode (pick any of the above mentioned reactions) to be able to be present to the compliment someone is offering me and then… gulp… accepting it.

My challenge to you: take time to accept a compliment (and keep giving them out).

How do you accept a compliment? Here are the simple steps:

  • Be present and listen to what the person is taking the time to tell you
  • Say: “Thank you”… then stop… period (avoid adding anything else… it’s harder than it seems).
  • Oh, and smile in the process. But know that your smile might look awkward in the beginning, but keep working on it. It’ll eventually come naturally.

With this, I’d like to thank you for reading my blog posts this year and for all of your comments (now practice the above skill)  :-)

Enjoy your summer!

Calling All Champions: My Favourite Part of the Day

by Alexandra Fortier, MSW, RSW.

“Calling all champions” is a monthly column by Compassion Fatigue Solutions Associate Alexandra Fortier. The intent is to get your fire started and to get your inner champion moving.  We’d love to hear from you so please weigh in!

For a long time now, so long that I can’t remember when it began, I’ve been spotting the good things that have happened to me and to others during the day. Even though certain days are much more difficult than others, I take a moment to think about what I liked, what went well, or even for how long did I feel well today.

This skill really helped me in my personal and professional life, and I wish to pass it along because of its simplicity. Read more ›

Appel aux Champions: Mon moment préféré de la journée

Par Alexandra Fortier, MSW, RSW.

« Appel aux champions » est une série mensuelle écrite par notre associée Alexandra Fortier dans le but de stimuler la conversation et donner vie à vos idées. Bref, l’intention est d’attiser votre enthousiasme et d’activer votre champion intérieur. Nous aimerions connaître vos idées et opinions. Partagez vos réactions avec nous! »

Depuis longtemps, en fait, depuis si longtemps que je ne me souviens pas depuis combien de temps, je prends le temps de remarquer les bonnes choses qui m’arrivent et qui arrivent aux autres dans une journée. Bien qu’il y ait des jours qui soient plus difficiles que d’autres, je prends un moment pour réfléchir à ce que j’ai aimé, ce qui a bien été, voir même pour combien de temps je me suis sentie bien aujourd’hui. Read more ›

How to Outsmart your Negative Brain

CARE4YOU: The Fifth Annual conference on Compassion Fatigue, Secondary Traumatic Stress and Burnout is designed to care for those who care for others. This year, the program was developed around the theme of “Creating Change Agents”. The Conference will be held in Kingston, On. June 9-10, 2015.

This week, we highlight some of our exciting speakers and topics

How to Outsmart your Negative Brain With Daniel Doherty

Do you ever find it challenging to separate your work and personal life?

Helping professionals often feel personally invested in their caring roles – after all, we are caring individuals. There are great rewards for your investment, but there can also be a great personal cost attached to helping others. It can become difficult to separate work from home, and sometimes affects our personal relationships. Our go-to coping mechanism is often detachment from work and home. While we hope to be protecting ourselves, catching our breath, relaxing, and re-charging, the end result of detachment can lead to simply basking in negative thoughts.

Daniel Doherty tackles these issues in his presentation ‘How to Outsmart Your Negative Brain.’ During this session, Daniel will help participants understand the effects of stress hormones adrenaline and cortisol on our limbic system and pre-frontal lobes. Neuropsychologist Rick Hanson, Ph.D., believes the brain has a built in “negativity bias.” Stress often reinforces this negative bias and also diminishes and/or decreases the useful effects of our “happy hormones.” By understanding our brains when they are stressed, we can take advantage of those “happy hormones” oxytocin, dopamine, serotonin, oxygen.

Throw in some jalapeno peppers and 26 seconds to learn how to outsmart the negative intrusive thoughts that keep us in a fatigued state of mind.

Daniel Doherty, MSN, works at Christiana Care Health Systems in Delaware. Christiana Care Health System is one of the country’s largest health care providers that serves more than 600,000 patients yearly; recently Christiana was honored with the Magnet Award status for excellence in nursing by the American Nurses Credentialing Center. For the past 20 years, Daniel has gained experience in emergency nursing and staff development. Daniel has presented similar workshops on this topic to over 100 staff members at Christiana Care Health System and 34 police officers in the Wilmington Delaware Department. Daniel is also a part of the adjunct faculty with Delaware Technical & Community College. Delaware Tech is the State’s first community college, and seeks to inspire their mission of commitment, responsiveness, and vision on a national and state level.

For more information on CARE4YOU click here

Change on a Dime & Sparkle like Sunshine

CARE4YOU: The Fifth Annual conference on Compassion Fatigue, Secondary Traumatic Stress and Burnout is designed to care for those who care for others. This year, the program was developed around the theme of “Creating Change Agents”. The Conference will be held in Kingston, On. June 9-10, 2015.

This week, we highlight some of our exciting speakers and topics

Change on a Dime & Sparkle Like Sunshine:

Bridging the Gap Between Neuroscience and Real Life Applications

heart and brain

Speakers: Steven Hughes and Farah Jindani

In this 75 minute session, Steven Hughes and Farah Jindani invite participants to engage their bodies and brains to experience innovative techniques in trauma therapy. Their creative approach highlights new insights and understanding of trauma exposure, and the role of trauma-informed interventions. Participants will gain resources, including handouts and experiential activities, which will help change the way they feel and learn. Techniques are drawn from fields such as mindfulness, developmental optometry, neuroscience, neuro-linguistic programming, motor development, positive psychology, acupuncture and dance. Activities take between 30 seconds to 1 minute, which assists in restoring a feeling of calmness and control while improving focus. Theory is complemented with plenty of opportunities for hands-on practice and skill-building practices. Participants will learn specific techniques and movement that complement learning styles. Steven and Farah use re-patterning sequences that activate visual, auditory, and kinesthetic areas of the brain to work in synergy. Their strategies will help you to gain confidence, control, and tools to facilitate lasting focus and relaxation.

Steven Hughes, M.Ed., CTDP is an Education Specialist at the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (CAMH) in Toronto. Steven provides educational programs that support physical and mental health, resilience and well-being. Steven integrates his interests and areas of expertise that include accelerated learning, positive organizational development, mindfulness, and wellness- based modalities. All of his programs support learners to gently explore the edges of their personal growth boundaries and to experience new realms of self-discovery. All of Steven’s programs are in harmony with trauma-informed and anti-oppression principles.

 

Farah Jindani, MSW, Ph.D has provided integrative counselling services to individuals, couples and adolescents for over 10 years. Farah studied psychology and gerontology at the University of Waterloo and went on to study criminology at the University of Cambridge, U.K. Her research interests led Farah to pursue a Masters of Social Work at the University of Toronto, specializing in Health and Mental Health.  Her approach is holistic, blending contemplative practices (including mindfulness, breath work, and yoga) with Western psychology and neuroscience. Her doctoral research focussed on the development, implementation and evaluation of an 8-week mindfulness/yoga program for post-traumatic stress. Farah seeks to understand traumatic stress within the context of each person’s lived experiences, relationships and society. She strives to increase resiliency and has developed training programs that assist with addiction, mental health and mindfulness. Farah currently works with the CAMH and provides consultation services.

 

 

For more information on CARE4YOU click here

Talk Matters: Working with Parents of Murdered & Missing Children

CARE4YOU: The Fifth Annual conference on Compassion Fatigue, Secondary Traumatic Stress and Burnout is designed to care for those who care for others. This year, the program was developed around the theme of “Creating Change Agents”. The Conference will be held in Kingston, On. June 9-10, 2015.

This week, we highlight some of our exciting speakers and topics

Talk Matters with Jill Norman

Vicarious trauma regularly happens to those in public service. Resources are often scarce, caseloads increase, and staffs are limited. It is a common problem: staff members are asked to perform more tasks and take on more work with ever decreasing support. So what can be done? What strategies can be used?

In this session, Jill Norman will share her experiences working with Service Canada. She will highlight best practices in providing staff assigned to vulnerable cases with strategies to minimize VT and Compassion Fatigue. Jill has spent time working on The Federal Income Grant for Parents of Murdered and Missing Children (PMMC), a program intended to help support families reeling from loss. She recognized that staff members offering client services like PMMC were continually exposed to traumatic events.

By changing the way her staff communicates with clients, Jill has inspired success in reducing Vicarious Trauma, especially among staff members communicating by telephone. Her PMMC team developed a series of scripts, which provided structure, confidence and quality assurance to clients. These scripts also improved staff efficiency and helped to effectively address stakeholders, alleviating red tape-related barriers. In reducing frustration and providing an effective communication tool for staff members, the team became much more than simply service providers.

Join Jill on Wednesday, June 10th to learn more about her methodologies. She seeks to teach and challenge participants in her session to “become change agents themselves.”

Jill Norman works as a senior manager with Service Canada, leading teams for over 7 years. She has been an instrumental leader in the provision of client service for the PMMC, the Common Experience Payment as part of the Indian Residential Schools Settlement Agreement, and the Wage Earner Protection Program. In 2014, Jill’s team won the Governor General’s Award of Excellence in Public Service in Citizen Focused Service Delivery for their role ensuring ex gratia payment for families of victims of the Air India Flight 182 tragedy. Jill also has over 20 years of nursing experience, including work in the field of disability case management.

For more information on CARE4YOU click here

Grounding Techniques for the Trauma-Exposed Practitioner

CARE4YOU: The Fifth Annual conference on Compassion Fatigue, Secondary Traumatic Stress and Burnout is designed to care for those who care for others. This year, the program was developed around the theme of “Creating Change Agents”. The Conference will be held in Kingston, On. June 9-10, 2015.

This week, we highlight some of our exciting speakers and topics

Emotional Freedom Technique: Creating Personal Change through Tapping With Diana Tikasz, MSW.

meditation

Do you ever feel stuck? Do you ever wish things would change, that you could be different? You are not alone. Too often we set resolutions, goals, and personal vows only to slip up and reach for that TV remote, that third chocolate cupcake and that second glass of wine. Making emotional changes is tough; we fall back on old patterns and give up on our goals. But deeper, lasting change is possible…especially if you have fun!

In her session, Diana Tikasz presents a powerful tool for creating personal change. ‘Emotional Freedom Technique’ is a simple acupressure technique that allows us to dig deeper and address the beliefs that can often sabotage our efforts and keep us feeling stuck. EFT has been growing in popularity because the simplicity of the technique can be applied to a wide variety of complex issues.

This workshop will provide hands-on training in the basics of EFT, and highlight emerging research that reveals a direct calming of stress in the body when EFT is applied. Diana will help teach you ways to create deeper emotional change that will stick.  Be prepared to have fun and tap into your “silly side” as you learn this procedure. The session is designed to not only help you create your own personal change, but to also help others realize their goals.

Diana Tikasz, MSW has worked in the teaching and health care sector for the past 27 years.  Her helping work began as an early childhood educator nurturing children and their families to reach their fullest potential. Over the course of her career she has worked in emergency department crisis teams, coordinated hospital based sexual assault/domestic violence treatment programs, which involved assisting individuals experiencing a current crisis, counselling those who have been traumatized by violence, and teaching other professionals how to do this work effectively while staying healthy themselves.  She has also worked in various Employee Assistance Programs and private practise where she has specialized in working with individuals who are feeling stressed by their personal and/or work life. Diana grounds her work in current knowledge of the neuro-biology of stress and trauma and utilizes techniques/strategies that work on rebalancing holistically.  Her passion is to assist people in creating personal, professional, and organizational changes that promote optimal health and make us more effective helpers.

 For more information on CARE4YOU click here

Healthy Living: Know, Nurture and Nourish Yourself

CARE4YOU: The Fifth Annual conference on Compassion Fatigue, Secondary Traumatic Stress and Burnout is designed to care for those who care for others. This year, the program was developed around the theme of “Creating Change Agents”. The Conference will be held in Kingston, On. June 9-10, 2015.

This week, we highlight some of our exciting speakers and topics

Food: Know, Nurture and Nourish Yourself

with Dr. Deb Thompson

In the helping profession, conscious self-care is challenging. Eating well, exercising and quality sleep are not always priorities, especially when competing commitments get in the way. Nourishing yourself for optimal energy, vitality, wellness and body composition is challenging, but not impossible. In this session, Dr. Deb Thompson shares her expertise in guiding helping professionals who struggle to sustain conscious self-care, including how, when, why and what to eat.

Her experiences include a personal weight loss of 85 lbs, which she has successfully maintained over 10 years. Her commitment to healthy nourishment is a personal and professional one. Throughout her presentation, participants will learn how to work with individual resistance, rebellion, preferences and competing commitments to forge a self-nourishment plan.

Participants will discover tools to help identify eating patterns, and ways to meet needs for fuel, flavor, fun, and comfort in deliciously effective fashion. She will encourage participants to become curious, compassionate and responsive to nourishment needs. As well, Dr. Thompson will help teach participants strategies for organizing nourishing efforts, since disorganization can undermine sustainable lifestyle change. Helping professionals are busy, responsible and caring people. This session is designed to help the helpers lead healthier, more joyous lives through the comfort of nourishing foods.

Dr. Deb Thompson is a Registered Psychologist and Integral Coach™. She has worked in private practice for almost 20 years as a therapist, and 7 years as a life and executive coach and fitness instructor, with a special interest in topics of self-care, health and wellness. Deb knows firsthand the challenges of integrating the commitments of self, family and work in a helping profession. Her approach includes cognitive behavioural therapy, acceptance and commitment therapy, person-centred therapy and compassion-focused therapy. She is committed to listening and questioning attentively without judgment, offering fresh perspectives and championing patient growth.

 For more information on CARE4YOU click here

Meet a Real Change Agent: Stéphane Grenier

CARE4YOU: The Fifth Annual conference on Compassion Fatigue, Secondary Traumatic Stress and Burnout is designed to care for those who care for others. This year, the program was developed around the theme of “Creating Change Agents”. The Conference will be held in Kingston, On. June 9-10, 2015.

Over the next two weeks, we will highlight some of our exciting speakers and topics

Keynote Presentation with Lieutenant-Colonel (Ret) Stéphane Grenier, Mental Health Advocate

Be Brave: Empower Agents of Change

Grenier_Stephane-Oct.-Blo-368x206

In today’s modern workplace, mental health problems have become the leading cause of disability claims, accounting for 70% of workplace disability management costs in Canada. As someone who continues to cope with the effects of former post-traumatic stress disorder and depression, Lieutenant-Colonel (Retired) Stéphane Grenier knows the toll mental health issues can take on individuals firsthand.

He also understands that for organizations, making changes to company policies and procedures and mobilizing human resources to create better, healthier, more effective teams is hard.  Stéphane Grenier has seen first-hand that there are often monumental changes that need to be effected, and that efforts to shift company culture can create fear.

LCol (Ret’d) Grenier will offer pragmatic advice to foster workplaces that support open, non-stigmatized approaches to mental health. He will encourage us to “Be Brave” and empower the agents of change in our organizations to be the ones that can lead the way to better, healthier, more effective workplaces.

For more information on CARE4YOU click here